Friday, September 24, 2010

Did that really happen!??!

Today was one of those "blah" days. I was kinda tired from the little girls waking up during the night. (I hope they outgrow the acid-reflux thing soon!) So I spent the morning sitting on the couch reading (The 6th book in The Sister's Grimm series). Then changed laundry. (Hurray!!! Only one load today!) I cleaned the kitchen and front room. We watched Sesame Street. I made lunch.
After I went with DS "Areo" to do baptisms. When we got home, "Sweet Senior" was wanting to go out, and asking for her allowance. I told her I had to go to the store to get stuff and would get change for allowance. So I left all but "Little Miss D" at home with "Sweet Senior", and the two of us went to get some groceries. While there I bumped into a good friend in the produce dept. I asked how she had gotten away without any one, then she asked how I got away with only one. While getting the needed fruits and veggies, I noticed that it seemed part of Sweet Miss D's french braid had been chopped.


Now, the other girls didn't have any hair til about 3 years old,
so I have been LOVING the little ones having hair!

Anyway, together my friend and I assessed the damage.

I was so freaked!
I called home, told Sweet Senior the deal.
(She had been babysitting,
or something, while I was with Areo).
She gave me the number to the salon.
I called them and asked if our hairdresser could fit her in.
She was busy, but another gal could do it.
It will be okay.
So I said good-bye and thanks to my friend.
(How did she happen to be there when I needed her?)
I checked out, got in the car.
(Good thing I was just in the produce section when this was
discovered and all could be left in the car)
and raced (well, went straight to) the salon.
After Little Miss D knocked over all the hair styling stuff for the 4th time,
our gal was ready for her.
She tried to just trim and even out, but it was too obvious,
so she did a cute A-line cut.
Little Miss D cried and wanted Mom to hold her.
"Sorry, I want this to turn out. But I'll hold your hands."
After it was cut, and styled, she got a sucker, and we headed for home.

Funny thing is, I've been seeing this coming for a while. I've kept the scissors on top of the fridge. When I went to get my hair cut, I told both the Little Misses D & E that I was going to a professional. That I didn't cut my own hair. That if they wanted a hair cut, to tell me and I would make them an appointment. They have been the WORST with scissors. Cutting books and magazines. Wanting to help with coupons. Always asking for scissors and paper to cut. I've given them the chance to use them so it wasn't a foreign thing or a novelty
(that's what I did with all of the kids, starting at 18 months).
So why is it that these two have been so HORRIBLE with them??

But the worst part of this:
She also cut her sister's hair.
Right on the top!!
That one will be harder to wait for.
We will be experimenting over the weekend.
Hopefully this will be a fun adventure in hair!
And not a major trial that sends me crying on the toilet every morning.

The best things: I am so grateful for my friend for being there. To Heavenly Father for having her there, and for helping to prepare me, so that I wouldn't just break down and cry. I am so blessed that we could get it sorta fixed. Now to wait for it to grow a bit, then re-cut it.

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Friday, September 17, 2010

Normal Week Followed by CrAzY

Last week was the best! I had preschool at our house. A bit hectic, but I was prepared, so it all worked out. (I'll post in a bit what we are doing this year.) `
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Wednesday, September 15, 2010

"P" (Personal Progress) Night

Our ward does something quite fun for Personal Progress activities. On Tuesday night, when they will be working on Personal Progress, they wear pajamas, and take something that starts with the letter "P".

Last night, this is what Elyse made to take:

She made Penguin cupcakes made with Pink cake mix. They turned out so cute for her first attempt, and on a time crunch.
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Monday, September 13, 2010

Traditions make families STRONG

tra*di*tion: adj. 1. The passing down of elements of a culture from generation to generation, especially orally. 2. A custom or usage handed down this way.

Our family has several traditions. The reason? To help us spend time together, especially in a fun ways.

"Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities."

So what do we do that is fun? Well, the little kids love to go bowling and swimming. We've even been able to convince the older kids to come with us. We make it fun. Call it our family date.

We sleep in the front room on Friday night. We fold out the couch or clear the floor. Grab sleeping bags. Watch a movie. Sometimes eat popcorn. We've been doing this for 16 years. The older kids don't always participate, but when they do, the little kids love it.

Food is a tradition in our home. We have crepes on Saturday. Cinnamon rolls on Sunday. Oatmeal for the little ones on Fast Sunday. Waffles on Wednesday. On your birthday, you pick what is for dinner.

There are the typical traditions: Scriptures and Family Prayer each evening. Family Home Evening each Monday. Pin It

Saturday, September 11, 2010

What can I do to get over this?

I'm not sure if I am the only one, but I have these days where I feel totally worthless. I can't do anything well, or right. And I don't have any true friends other than family. No one wants to hang with me. I am totally down. This is how I felt Thursday afternoon. I hate when I get like this. I start trying to figure out why. Have I done something wrong? Have I hurt someone's feelings? Have I not done something I should have?
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Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Parenting Means Listening

"Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. "Children are an heritage of the Lord" (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations."

Our family has a wide range of ages. Not as wide as some. My grandma's family was quite large (13 children) and the older ones would help care for the younger. Our family is smaller and I am able to care for the little ones. But I think that means the older children and left out.
I took a class a while ago at a Relief Society Conference in our stake. At the time I was so exhausted. Two newborns. A 15 year old. 4 others in between. It took every ounce of strength I had to keep up with the twins. I had little else for the rest of the family. A lot of the work fell on my sweet husband and the older two girls. But the one thing I did have time for, was to listen. Listen to how their day was. Listen to what they were liking at school. What they were hating at school. Listen to what they had planned for the weekend. I learned then that if that is all you can do, it will be enough.
Our second daughter went to live with her dad. That has been a hard thing for me. She had asked before if she could go live with him, but I always felt it wasn't a good thing. But this time, after praying unceasingly for a week on what to do, I felt she should go. I love and miss her so much. She is so fun, and she kept me on my toes. I learned from her how to keep going when I was tired. But after seeing how she is doing, it was the right decision. She had started to refuse to go to church. She didn't want to be home. She treated her siblings badly. Now she treats them better. She has had to be more responsible and take care of her things on her own. If she needs to be somewhere at a certain time, it is totally up to her to get there.

I am still there for her. I send her messages on Facebook, in emails, and talk to her on the phone. She still comes to me with her troubles, with her triumphs.

I watched this clip this morning, and it reminded me that we need to start being there to listen when our children are young. When they are not in school yet. Talk to them about our day, about their day.

Another thing we do to keep communication lines open, we always have dinner together. Sometimes we let the kids eat with friends, or let them have someone over for dinner. But for the most part, we are all together for this very important meal. We, as parents, need that time to check on how the kids are doing. The kids need that time to be together. The little ones need that time to learn how to behave at the table.

I love having my children around me. I love being at home. I want them to know they can come to me with anything. And that I will listen to them. Even if it something I don't want to hear. I love them and will always be there for them. Pin It

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

What is so Special About Marriage?

Marriage is such an amazing thing.
In the Proclamation it states:
"We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of His children."

What do we need marriage for. Well, there are many things are need marriage for. To start with, just the companionship I have with my husband is worth more than I can explain. He is there for me when I am having a bad day, or week! He helps me know that things will work out and that I can get through whatever is going on. He reminds me of the eternal focus I need to have. That this life is only a blink, and then all will be wonderful.
We also keep each other going. For example, we walk together in the mornings while the older kids are getting ready for school. Then after they leave, we read scriptures together. This has led to so many great discussions. Mainly me asking questions and he giving answers. But it is so good to have someone to do this with. To have conversations about the meaning of things in an eternal perspective. I definitely didn't have this in my last marriage. In fact it was usually me defending things that I really didn't fully understand anyway, but knew they were true.
We also set goals and discuss problems and how to solve them together.
As a single mom, I really felt like I needed to have a man there to back me up. But also to listen to me and give his opinion. A male perspective is so enlightening. Sometimes I think that maybe if I keep listening to him, then I can think like him.
When I am talking to the kids about something we need to change, and they start talking back, I don't know what to say. I'm not good with confrontation. I don't know what to say. One day when I had one of these conversations, My brother in law was over, and tony asked what I said. Then he told me what he would have said. It was such a great comment. Not harsh. Not mean. Just something to get them thinking. So I said, "I wish that you could just be inside my mind all the time so I will know what to say in these situations." And that is how I feel. I wish I could know what he would do in times like these. Then I would be better able to handle things.
Needless to say, my BIN was amazed that I felt that way. He said that you know it's a great marriage when your spouse makes you a better person.

Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity."

It is definitely a divine role we have as parents. It is so rewarding, as well as trying. I know that when it is all you, it can be harder than is should be. As a single mom, you feel that you aren't doing a good job. mainly because there are SO MANY things left undone. And when you are the only one doing them (especially if you have young children) then you are overwhelmed. Which makes you feel bad, so you do less. It is a vicious cycle.
But if you have a help meet (see Gen 2:18), then it is okay. You don't HAVE to do it ALL. You have someone there to do what you can't.
I am very spoiled!! I get so frazzled by the end of the day. So it seems like half the time when my sweetheart comes home, the house is in chaos. Well, he will walk in, give me a kiss. Say "hi" to the kids, then start helping find some sanity. I love him. It used to make me feel like a failure. But after a few times of him staying home and not being able to accomplish anything, I saw it was just how life with small children is.
We are also there for each other. It seems that when we have had enough of WHATEVER. The disobedience, the messes, the fighting, then the other is there to step in. Then you can get a break and be ready to face the next challenge. It is so nice, and I find I can control my temper knowing that the home doesn't just rely on me. My back-up will be here soon.
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